Epidurals- A Colorado Springs Doula's Outlook
When I had my daughter, I kept thinking that if I were to have gotten the epidural it would mean that I had failed. I felt like I had something to prove. I felt like if I got the epidural it meant that I wasn’t strong or maybe I wasn’t a good mom. I had so many thoughts about it. I know I am not the only person to think that either. After the birth of my daughter I went through such an emotionally hard time. I struggled so badly postpartum. I felt like I wasn’t strong. I was scared to share that I got the epidural because I had told everyone I wanted to go med-free. I was scared of the judgement. The only person who was judging me was myself though.
Mothers have this kind of competitive mentality. We aren’t really in a competition with other mothers either though. We are in a competition with ourselves and it is draining. We somehow make ourselves think that if we don't do this or we don’t do that, that it means we have failed. There are no trophies for motherhood though. If you get the epidural it doesn’t mean you are any weaker than a mother who has a natural birth. If you have a medicated birth it doesn’t mean you are any weaker than another mother. Your story is just different and that is okay. All these tools and interventions are there for a reason.
I really believe that all these tools are great to have. Sometimes moms need help. Sometimes they need sleep and rest so their bodies can relax and open for their babies. Sometimes babies are in a weird position and the moms have been working so hard and the fact that they can’t sleep, they can’t relax makes labor longer and harder. Sometimes the epidural can be an amazing tool to take advantage of.
As with any tool, it is important to know the risks and benefits. Being educated on your choices is what matters. My job is to help moms get the best experience possible. I will do my damn best to make that possible. The best birth experience isn’t always the one that you had planned though. That is okay!
Just because you got an epidural does not mean you are not strong. You have grown a baby. You have worked your ass off. You have given birth. No matter how you go about that, you are a strong, bad ass mother. I don’t want you to think any differently.
